April 24, 2011
SAMMY SCIENCE GIVES IT ANOTHER TRY: A SCIENCE Q&A
Sammy Science here, after a long absence from these pages. No, I haven't been ill or on any sort of sabbatical, just tired of the lack of scientific acumen of the readers of bobcrespo.com. This is supposed to be a Science Q&A, not a forum for science-bashing, religious preaching or wacky theories. Let's see what science topics we can discuss today, shall we?
Dear Sammy Science: What's the story with those Chinese cows that produce human breast milk? Can I get one? -Nadya from California
Dear Nadya from California: So far all we know is that a claim hads been made that through genetic manipulation, cows can produce milk with the same nutrients present in human breast milk. Until scientific papers are published and proof presented, all we have so far is the claim of success. There have been many exciting development in genetic research on animals involving the regeneration of body parts and organs. As far as you being able to get your own cow, doubtful. Chinese food products haven't had the most stellar record when it comes to not poisoning consumers, and the USDA tends to frown on that sort of thing.
Dear Sammy Science: Is there a scientific definition of love? It is, after all, a very real phenomenon.- Jack Enjill
Dear Jack Enjill: Interesting question. While science has traditionally shied away from the exploration of love, in recent years studies of human emotions have been undertaken, mostly involving the chemical processing of information by the substances and synapses in our brains, using neuro-imaging and other scientific tools. One school of thought is that love is a survival mechanism no different from aggression or territoriality, with nurturing and sexual attraction having developed in the higher species to ensure the survival of generations. Complex animals produce a limited number of offspring as opposed to, say, fish or insects, which produce millions of eggs and offspring who are pretty much on their own from birth, so emotional attachments evolved as a necessary survival tool. No one who has felt love's overwhelmingly compelling power can argue that love is voluntary. None of this, however, explains why some people love, art, vintage cars, stamp collecting or baseball, which have nothing at all to so with the survival of individuals or species. So far scientists are no closer than poets and philosophers to defining love, and to my mind that's a good thing. Who would want a dry scientific explanation of something as cool as love?
Dear Sammy Science: How can you subscribe to the Theory of Evolution? The Bible plainly tells us that God created everything in Seven Days, 6,000 years ago just as it is today. Show me proof! I'll come down to your laboratory with an open mind if you've got the goods. Consider your self challenged, science man! - Reverend Jimmy Crackcorn
Dear Reverend Jimmy Crackcorn: Oh geez.... and this was going so well today.... well, Reverend, all the proof you need for evolution is in your mirror. What you see is a dead end, with a mind no more open than a clam in defensive posture. I'm sure there's nothing I can show you that will convince you of the truth, but you know what? That doesn't matter, since there are enough people who do embrace the sciences for progress and understanding to continue flourishing without you.
Dear Sammy Science: Not so fast, heathen! All the growing we need to do is the grow our understanding of God's word. - Reverend Jimmy Crackcorn
Dear Reverend Jimmy Crackcorn: Yeah, anything you say, Rev... Hey quick, look over there! There's an abortionist and a transvestite union leader on your front lawn! They've come for your daughters! (That ought to keep the Reverend busy while we get back to science.)
Dear Sammy Science: What are you science guys gonna get around to inventing transporters and warp drive like they have in Star Trek? Or how about curing cancer? - Jimmy The Geek
Dear Jimmy The Geek: Well, Jimmy, we already have computers and communications devices every bit as sophisticated as Captain Kirk's, plus a worldwide information network, so it's not like science is standing still here. As far as beaming people aboard and breaking the speed limit of the light barrier imposed by the laws of physics, don't hold you breath. We can't cure a cold, but medical science is curing more and more cancer patients every year. Scientific progress is measured in decades, not months.
Dear Sammy Science: How about at least providing a computer to each child like some charity planned? - Jimmy The Geek
Dear Jimmy The Geek: Don't forget, Jimmy, that half the population of the world still lives exactly as they did 150 years ago, and a quarter of the planet's inhabitants have never spoken on a telephone, so let's not pretend we're living in a completely modern world. Hard as it is to imagine for an American kid, not every child has access to electricity, TV or communications devices of any sort. Many cannot read or operate even the simpler electronic devices, and their plight is more social, educational and political problems than a purely scientific one, since they as smart as anyone else, just left out of the technology loop. Unfortunately for the world, they all seem to get the hang of an AK-47 pretty quick.
Dear Sammy Science: I have felt a great rift in The Force recently, a painful fissure. Can you explain that? - Eddie Fissure
Dear Eddie Fissure: Either you have me confused with a Trekkie, or a proctologist to examine that painful fissure you sit on. Can we keep the questions scientific here, people?
Dear Sammy Science: Is it true that with the recent nuclear disaster in northern Japan and the subsequent radioactive waste being pumped into the Pacific ocean, that sea life rapidly mutating into monstrous forms? - Kay Lastima
Dear Kay Lastima: If you mean transformed into dead marine life, yes. If you're referring to highly dangerous levels of radiation in the surviving species that make up a big part of humanity's food supply, yes. If your talking Godzilla here, well, there's not a whole lot we have to discuss, is there?
Dear Sammy Science: I know I science question, I know I science question! Pick me pick me pick meeee! - Kenny Bunkport
Dear Kenny Bunkport: I know I may regret this, but go ahead, Kenny. What is your science question?
Dear Sammy Science: Okay then, Sammy Science! In Einstein's Special Theory of Relativity, what is the equation for calculating the degree to which gravity bends light? - Kenny Bunkportz
Dear Kenny Bunkport: Thank you, Kenny! Sorry I doubted you. Here is is: g = 1 / Ö [1 - (v/c)2]. Okay, now we're getting back to my living room. Who's next?
Dear Sammy Science: In a fight, who would win - Superman or Satan? - Van Erielle
Dear Van Erielle: Why do I do this to myself? I know I should have quit with Kenny Bunkport! This is just sick on too many levels. Okay, Van, I'm going with Superman on this one, if only for his having fewer serious issues than Satan. Well folks, on this low note, Sammy Science is out of here!
Dear Sammy Science: What's the story with those Chinese cows that produce human breast milk? Can I get one? -Nadya from California
Dear Nadya from California: So far all we know is that a claim hads been made that through genetic manipulation, cows can produce milk with the same nutrients present in human breast milk. Until scientific papers are published and proof presented, all we have so far is the claim of success. There have been many exciting development in genetic research on animals involving the regeneration of body parts and organs. As far as you being able to get your own cow, doubtful. Chinese food products haven't had the most stellar record when it comes to not poisoning consumers, and the USDA tends to frown on that sort of thing.
Dear Sammy Science: Is there a scientific definition of love? It is, after all, a very real phenomenon.- Jack Enjill
Dear Jack Enjill: Interesting question. While science has traditionally shied away from the exploration of love, in recent years studies of human emotions have been undertaken, mostly involving the chemical processing of information by the substances and synapses in our brains, using neuro-imaging and other scientific tools. One school of thought is that love is a survival mechanism no different from aggression or territoriality, with nurturing and sexual attraction having developed in the higher species to ensure the survival of generations. Complex animals produce a limited number of offspring as opposed to, say, fish or insects, which produce millions of eggs and offspring who are pretty much on their own from birth, so emotional attachments evolved as a necessary survival tool. No one who has felt love's overwhelmingly compelling power can argue that love is voluntary. None of this, however, explains why some people love, art, vintage cars, stamp collecting or baseball, which have nothing at all to so with the survival of individuals or species. So far scientists are no closer than poets and philosophers to defining love, and to my mind that's a good thing. Who would want a dry scientific explanation of something as cool as love?
Dear Sammy Science: How can you subscribe to the Theory of Evolution? The Bible plainly tells us that God created everything in Seven Days, 6,000 years ago just as it is today. Show me proof! I'll come down to your laboratory with an open mind if you've got the goods. Consider your self challenged, science man! - Reverend Jimmy Crackcorn
Dear Reverend Jimmy Crackcorn: Oh geez.... and this was going so well today.... well, Reverend, all the proof you need for evolution is in your mirror. What you see is a dead end, with a mind no more open than a clam in defensive posture. I'm sure there's nothing I can show you that will convince you of the truth, but you know what? That doesn't matter, since there are enough people who do embrace the sciences for progress and understanding to continue flourishing without you.
Dear Sammy Science: Not so fast, heathen! All the growing we need to do is the grow our understanding of God's word. - Reverend Jimmy Crackcorn
Dear Reverend Jimmy Crackcorn: Yeah, anything you say, Rev... Hey quick, look over there! There's an abortionist and a transvestite union leader on your front lawn! They've come for your daughters! (That ought to keep the Reverend busy while we get back to science.)
Dear Sammy Science: What are you science guys gonna get around to inventing transporters and warp drive like they have in Star Trek? Or how about curing cancer? - Jimmy The Geek
Dear Jimmy The Geek: Well, Jimmy, we already have computers and communications devices every bit as sophisticated as Captain Kirk's, plus a worldwide information network, so it's not like science is standing still here. As far as beaming people aboard and breaking the speed limit of the light barrier imposed by the laws of physics, don't hold you breath. We can't cure a cold, but medical science is curing more and more cancer patients every year. Scientific progress is measured in decades, not months.
Dear Sammy Science: How about at least providing a computer to each child like some charity planned? - Jimmy The Geek
Dear Jimmy The Geek: Don't forget, Jimmy, that half the population of the world still lives exactly as they did 150 years ago, and a quarter of the planet's inhabitants have never spoken on a telephone, so let's not pretend we're living in a completely modern world. Hard as it is to imagine for an American kid, not every child has access to electricity, TV or communications devices of any sort. Many cannot read or operate even the simpler electronic devices, and their plight is more social, educational and political problems than a purely scientific one, since they as smart as anyone else, just left out of the technology loop. Unfortunately for the world, they all seem to get the hang of an AK-47 pretty quick.
Dear Sammy Science: I have felt a great rift in The Force recently, a painful fissure. Can you explain that? - Eddie Fissure
Dear Eddie Fissure: Either you have me confused with a Trekkie, or a proctologist to examine that painful fissure you sit on. Can we keep the questions scientific here, people?
Dear Sammy Science: Is it true that with the recent nuclear disaster in northern Japan and the subsequent radioactive waste being pumped into the Pacific ocean, that sea life rapidly mutating into monstrous forms? - Kay Lastima
Dear Kay Lastima: If you mean transformed into dead marine life, yes. If you're referring to highly dangerous levels of radiation in the surviving species that make up a big part of humanity's food supply, yes. If your talking Godzilla here, well, there's not a whole lot we have to discuss, is there?
Dear Sammy Science: I know I science question, I know I science question! Pick me pick me pick meeee! - Kenny Bunkport
Dear Kenny Bunkport: I know I may regret this, but go ahead, Kenny. What is your science question?
Dear Sammy Science: Okay then, Sammy Science! In Einstein's Special Theory of Relativity, what is the equation for calculating the degree to which gravity bends light? - Kenny Bunkportz
Dear Kenny Bunkport: Thank you, Kenny! Sorry I doubted you. Here is is: g = 1 / Ö [1 - (v/c)2]. Okay, now we're getting back to my living room. Who's next?
Dear Sammy Science: In a fight, who would win - Superman or Satan? - Van Erielle
Dear Van Erielle: Why do I do this to myself? I know I should have quit with Kenny Bunkport! This is just sick on too many levels. Okay, Van, I'm going with Superman on this one, if only for his having fewer serious issues than Satan. Well folks, on this low note, Sammy Science is out of here!
April 10, 2011
LIFE EXPLAINED, PART 779
People without any of the usual human vices often make up for it by appointing themselves judge and jury over yours, creating a whole new category of annoying, so it works out pretty evenly.
THINGS WE SHOULD HAVE SEEN COMING, BUT DIDN'T
Sometimes things happen that take us by complete surprise, but shouldn't have:
The Jersey Shore: When the runaway entertainment sensation of the year is a celebration of vulgarity, casual cruelty and blissful ignorance, we have reached a crossroads: do we pursue the crass and talent-free, or try to get back on the high road? When we started down this road of lowest common denominator television, so-called Reality Programming (created only so producers wouldn't have to "waste" money on expensive acting talent and gifted writers and directors), it was only a matter of time before our children assumed that crude stupidity is a viable, desirable option.
The Tea Party: When 10 second sound bites replaced reading, thinking, paying attention to informed debates on important issues and forming our political opinions accordingly, did it not follow that the dumbest and most mentally lazy among us would consider themselves modern Thomas Jeffersons? Get used to inarticulate anger masquerading as policy. Lewis Carroll would be proud of the these Mad Hatters and their schizoid tea party.
Extreme Christianity: Taking a cue from unschooled Muslim rabble rousers, America's fastest growing religion is not a religion at all, but a political movement that completely refutes the message of Jesus Christ, putting words in his mouth that he never said and fusing them with half baked jingoist political ideas, thus creating a hybrid creed called Hatriotism. (See "Tea Party," above.)
The Financial Meltdown if 2008: Once CEOs discarded the old rule of thumb that they earn 20 to 30 times what their average workers earned and decided they were worth 400 times their average employees' salaries while demanding huge bonuses and Golden Parachute clauses paying them a kings ransom whether they ran their companies well or straight into the ground, as sure as day follows night the focus came off producing high-quality products and services and on to stealing as much money as humanly possible by any means at their disposal. When their crimes dragged the entire world's economy into the toilet, their wealth increased as everyone else's decreased.
High Fructose Corn Syrup: That super sweet concoction knows as "sugar's sugar" has found its way into thousands and thousands of processed food products, even salad dressings, sending medical science searching for a stronger term than "obese" to describe the phenomenon of the fattening up of America. Hence the term "morbidly obese." Thanks, Giant Agribusiness! You have succeeded where mere farmers have failed, what with their antiquated obsession with producing nutritious, wholesome food.
Hessians: With America's descent from a Republic to a world-straddling Empire, our all-volunteer army had proved inadequate to the task of conquering the entire world, prompting the Pentagon to hire high-priced mercenaries to flesh out the ranks of our military might. Professional soldiers from many different nations whose only loyalty is to the highest bidder, they are cynically called "contractors" and are subject to no law; domestic, military, foreign or international. They have proved themselves invaluable for spreading terror among occupied nations with wanton murder sprees and routine violations of the Geneva Convention. There are some jobs deemed too low for even the CIA (hard as that is to comprehend given their track record). Enter the private contractors, who come in very handy for performing their "super-dirty work," ensuring the CIA's inclusion in the critical striking-numb-helpless-fear-into-hearts department and cementing their place in history alongside the legendary Gestapo, KGB and NKVD. Thank you, Hessians!
The Jersey Shore: When the runaway entertainment sensation of the year is a celebration of vulgarity, casual cruelty and blissful ignorance, we have reached a crossroads: do we pursue the crass and talent-free, or try to get back on the high road? When we started down this road of lowest common denominator television, so-called Reality Programming (created only so producers wouldn't have to "waste" money on expensive acting talent and gifted writers and directors), it was only a matter of time before our children assumed that crude stupidity is a viable, desirable option.
The Tea Party: When 10 second sound bites replaced reading, thinking, paying attention to informed debates on important issues and forming our political opinions accordingly, did it not follow that the dumbest and most mentally lazy among us would consider themselves modern Thomas Jeffersons? Get used to inarticulate anger masquerading as policy. Lewis Carroll would be proud of the these Mad Hatters and their schizoid tea party.
Extreme Christianity: Taking a cue from unschooled Muslim rabble rousers, America's fastest growing religion is not a religion at all, but a political movement that completely refutes the message of Jesus Christ, putting words in his mouth that he never said and fusing them with half baked jingoist political ideas, thus creating a hybrid creed called Hatriotism. (See "Tea Party," above.)
The Financial Meltdown if 2008: Once CEOs discarded the old rule of thumb that they earn 20 to 30 times what their average workers earned and decided they were worth 400 times their average employees' salaries while demanding huge bonuses and Golden Parachute clauses paying them a kings ransom whether they ran their companies well or straight into the ground, as sure as day follows night the focus came off producing high-quality products and services and on to stealing as much money as humanly possible by any means at their disposal. When their crimes dragged the entire world's economy into the toilet, their wealth increased as everyone else's decreased.
High Fructose Corn Syrup: That super sweet concoction knows as "sugar's sugar" has found its way into thousands and thousands of processed food products, even salad dressings, sending medical science searching for a stronger term than "obese" to describe the phenomenon of the fattening up of America. Hence the term "morbidly obese." Thanks, Giant Agribusiness! You have succeeded where mere farmers have failed, what with their antiquated obsession with producing nutritious, wholesome food.
Hessians: With America's descent from a Republic to a world-straddling Empire, our all-volunteer army had proved inadequate to the task of conquering the entire world, prompting the Pentagon to hire high-priced mercenaries to flesh out the ranks of our military might. Professional soldiers from many different nations whose only loyalty is to the highest bidder, they are cynically called "contractors" and are subject to no law; domestic, military, foreign or international. They have proved themselves invaluable for spreading terror among occupied nations with wanton murder sprees and routine violations of the Geneva Convention. There are some jobs deemed too low for even the CIA (hard as that is to comprehend given their track record). Enter the private contractors, who come in very handy for performing their "super-dirty work," ensuring the CIA's inclusion in the critical striking-numb-helpless-fear-into-hearts department and cementing their place in history alongside the legendary Gestapo, KGB and NKVD. Thank you, Hessians!
April 2, 2011
LIFE EXPLAINED, PART 778
The level-headed and cautious may survive history, but the bold and unconventional make history.
DOPOTO REPORTS: IT'S 2011, AND PASSAGE IS BEING BOOKED IN THE HAND BASKET TO HELL
The Department Of Pointing Out The Obvious (DOPOTO) has been working overtime to absorb the global chaos that has thus far marked the year 2011. Researchers, senior analysts and interns alike have been barraged by reports of the odd, the unsettling, the surprising and the utterly catastrophic. Our earnest efforts to fulfill our only function (pointing out the obvious!) has been a remarkable challenge so far this year.
For example, recent events in Japan started out as straightforward observations of the twin natural disasters of a major earthquake and a tsunami striking northern Japan, but those two events were quickly relegated to be relatively minor issues compared to the simultaneous failures of 3 out of 6 nuclear reactors located in the area.
While most observers have reported this unprecedented tragedy as strictly a Japanese problem, the discovery of trace elements of radiation from those reactors in milk produced by cows in Washington State and dangerous levels of radiation in the Pacific Ocean fisheries that feed many nations have identified the Japanese meltdowns as a global problem. Mainstream media outlets have been slow to recognize this 800 pound gorilla in the room.
Similarly, the widespread outbreak of popular revolutions in the Middle East and Northern Africa has riveted the world's attention once again to the most politically volatile region on earth, all the while ignoring the West's complicity in the deplorable conditions leading up to these events. European Colonialism, followed immediately by International Corporate Colonialism, has stoked the coals of resentment in a thousand dusty, impoverished towns for centuries.
When those coals burst into the flames of Islamic fundamentalist jihad against Western interests in the past 25 years, the blame was placed on people (!) worshipping the wrong God, ignoring the obvious results of artificially mandated national borders, foreign and corporate interference in governments and the complete disenfranchisement of citizens within their own nations. Widespread poverty, disease and illiteracy in "oil rich" nations created conditions that had nowhere to go but downhill fast.
In belated acknowledgment of all this, NATO forces have been bombing Libyan dictator Muammar Qadaffi's armed forces to prevent them from killing his own citizens who had risen in revolt against his 40-year reign, during which time Qadaffi has been a sponsor of state terror and a looter of his own nation's treasury, amassing 140 tons of pure gold with which to pay his "security forces," well-paid mercenaries loyal only to their paymaster.
Also during that time, international oil companies have reaped billions in profits from Libyan petroleum, paying a king's ransom to Qadaffi to maintain the status quo of misery in Libya. The oil companies even chipped in to pay his $1.5 billion settlement with the relatives of Qafaffi's victims of the Lockerbie jet bombing over Scotland, a savage incident of state-sponsored terror that outraged the entire world. And this was after they looked the other way when Qafaffi bombed a disco in Germany that killed American servicemen, an act that prompted President Reagan to retaliate by bombing Tripoli.
Qadaffi is not an anomaly, but typical of the leaders of these nations; greedy and power mad dictators and kings propped up by Western military might on behalf of Western business interests at the direct expense of millions of people's lives. Those expecting that the Western nations' belated verbal and military support of these nations' human rights and popular revolutions will result in these new governments continuing the old relationships in the old way are bound to be sorely disappointed (especially since only those nations sitting atop a sea of oil qualify for military intervention while the poorer countries benefit only from our leaders bestowing them their most earnest "atta boys" and "'way to gos!" to help them overthrow their respective bloodthirsty tyrants).
Another lesson lost on many people concerning the interdependence of all nations is the murder spree being conducted by Mexican drug cartels, an actual shooting war against the Mexican government and innocent bystanders by criminal gangs determined to win their share of the billions to be made by selling illegal drugs to American citizens.
The United States could end this war tomorrow by legalizing these drugs, but powerful interests stand in the way of ending this Prohibition: most prominently the DEA and other elements of a gargantuan drug-fighting law enforcement infrastructure, and the huge growth industry that the American penal system has become.
The unceasing demand for recreational drugs by American consumers has proven the futility of the War on Drugs, just as alcohol prohibition had failed 80 years prior, succeeding only in creating a wealthy class of murderous organized criminals. Yesterday's bootleggers founded vast fortunes supplying the nation with booze, and there's even more money to be made today on products made from weeds and wild plants.
With over 2,000,000 American citizens in prison, half of them POWs in the Was on Drugs, and a neighboring nation being corrupted and destroyed by the habits of our consenting adults, almost no one considers implementing the only logical step: ending this futile prohibition and taxing and regulating the sales of drugs that are selling like hot cakes anyway, legal or not, just like we do with the most deadly drug known to man, alcohol.
Normal commerce, better relations with our neighboring nations, and a welcome shot in the arm to our treasury are what we have to gain. What do we have to lose? Half our prisons, for one, and the pervasive sense of hypocrisy that surrounds this issue. It's getting harder and harder to see the forest for the trees. We deny that nuclear meltdowns in foreign countries affect anyone beyond their borders, support the revolutions of those we once helped to oppress and allow a good neighbor to drown in the excesses of our citizens. Pointing out the obvious is a thankless business, but we here at DOPOTO feel obligated to point out the painfully obvious (our spcialty!); that we are all in this world together and hurt one another at our collective peril.
This was a report from The Department Of Pointing Out The Obvious.
For example, recent events in Japan started out as straightforward observations of the twin natural disasters of a major earthquake and a tsunami striking northern Japan, but those two events were quickly relegated to be relatively minor issues compared to the simultaneous failures of 3 out of 6 nuclear reactors located in the area.
While most observers have reported this unprecedented tragedy as strictly a Japanese problem, the discovery of trace elements of radiation from those reactors in milk produced by cows in Washington State and dangerous levels of radiation in the Pacific Ocean fisheries that feed many nations have identified the Japanese meltdowns as a global problem. Mainstream media outlets have been slow to recognize this 800 pound gorilla in the room.
Similarly, the widespread outbreak of popular revolutions in the Middle East and Northern Africa has riveted the world's attention once again to the most politically volatile region on earth, all the while ignoring the West's complicity in the deplorable conditions leading up to these events. European Colonialism, followed immediately by International Corporate Colonialism, has stoked the coals of resentment in a thousand dusty, impoverished towns for centuries.
When those coals burst into the flames of Islamic fundamentalist jihad against Western interests in the past 25 years, the blame was placed on people (!) worshipping the wrong God, ignoring the obvious results of artificially mandated national borders, foreign and corporate interference in governments and the complete disenfranchisement of citizens within their own nations. Widespread poverty, disease and illiteracy in "oil rich" nations created conditions that had nowhere to go but downhill fast.
In belated acknowledgment of all this, NATO forces have been bombing Libyan dictator Muammar Qadaffi's armed forces to prevent them from killing his own citizens who had risen in revolt against his 40-year reign, during which time Qadaffi has been a sponsor of state terror and a looter of his own nation's treasury, amassing 140 tons of pure gold with which to pay his "security forces," well-paid mercenaries loyal only to their paymaster.
Also during that time, international oil companies have reaped billions in profits from Libyan petroleum, paying a king's ransom to Qadaffi to maintain the status quo of misery in Libya. The oil companies even chipped in to pay his $1.5 billion settlement with the relatives of Qafaffi's victims of the Lockerbie jet bombing over Scotland, a savage incident of state-sponsored terror that outraged the entire world. And this was after they looked the other way when Qafaffi bombed a disco in Germany that killed American servicemen, an act that prompted President Reagan to retaliate by bombing Tripoli.
Qadaffi is not an anomaly, but typical of the leaders of these nations; greedy and power mad dictators and kings propped up by Western military might on behalf of Western business interests at the direct expense of millions of people's lives. Those expecting that the Western nations' belated verbal and military support of these nations' human rights and popular revolutions will result in these new governments continuing the old relationships in the old way are bound to be sorely disappointed (especially since only those nations sitting atop a sea of oil qualify for military intervention while the poorer countries benefit only from our leaders bestowing them their most earnest "atta boys" and "'way to gos!" to help them overthrow their respective bloodthirsty tyrants).
Another lesson lost on many people concerning the interdependence of all nations is the murder spree being conducted by Mexican drug cartels, an actual shooting war against the Mexican government and innocent bystanders by criminal gangs determined to win their share of the billions to be made by selling illegal drugs to American citizens.
The United States could end this war tomorrow by legalizing these drugs, but powerful interests stand in the way of ending this Prohibition: most prominently the DEA and other elements of a gargantuan drug-fighting law enforcement infrastructure, and the huge growth industry that the American penal system has become.
The unceasing demand for recreational drugs by American consumers has proven the futility of the War on Drugs, just as alcohol prohibition had failed 80 years prior, succeeding only in creating a wealthy class of murderous organized criminals. Yesterday's bootleggers founded vast fortunes supplying the nation with booze, and there's even more money to be made today on products made from weeds and wild plants.
With over 2,000,000 American citizens in prison, half of them POWs in the Was on Drugs, and a neighboring nation being corrupted and destroyed by the habits of our consenting adults, almost no one considers implementing the only logical step: ending this futile prohibition and taxing and regulating the sales of drugs that are selling like hot cakes anyway, legal or not, just like we do with the most deadly drug known to man, alcohol.
Normal commerce, better relations with our neighboring nations, and a welcome shot in the arm to our treasury are what we have to gain. What do we have to lose? Half our prisons, for one, and the pervasive sense of hypocrisy that surrounds this issue. It's getting harder and harder to see the forest for the trees. We deny that nuclear meltdowns in foreign countries affect anyone beyond their borders, support the revolutions of those we once helped to oppress and allow a good neighbor to drown in the excesses of our citizens. Pointing out the obvious is a thankless business, but we here at DOPOTO feel obligated to point out the painfully obvious (our spcialty!); that we are all in this world together and hurt one another at our collective peril.
This was a report from The Department Of Pointing Out The Obvious.
April 1, 2011
LIFE EXPLAINED, PART 777
If you have something to say, be as clear and direct as you can. Being ambiguous is for poets, drunks and politicians.
THE ANSWER MAN IS HERE FOR YOU!
It's that time again, Ladies and Gents! The Answer Man is back, and he's here for you. You ask a question, Answer man answers it! What could be simpler? Remember, you must ask a question or I cannot help you. Lets see what's in the Inbox, shall we?
Dear Answer Man: You're a bit of a horse's ass, aren't you? - Heywood Djablomi
Dear Heywood Djablomi: Yes, yes I am, but at least my name isn't Heywood Djablomi! Next!
Dear Answer Man: What's the difference between genius and stupidity? - Al Dante
Dear Al Dante: Genius has its limits. Next!
Dear Answer Man: Is it true that you can't teach an old dog new tricks? -Freida Peebles
Dear Freida Peebles: Not true at all, Freida! Food and sleep deprivation combined with a cattle prod are marvelous motivational tools, even for old dogs who are "set in their ways." Next!
Dear Answer Man: That's just sick! -Freida Peebles
Dear Freida Peebles: I'm sorry Freida, but you didn't put this in the form of question so The Answer Man can't help you. Next!
Dear Answer Man: How can you give that lady such unethical advice? - Ben Dover
Dear Ben Dover: I'm sorry, but did you see anything about ethics or advice in Ms. Peebles' question? I sure didn't. She merely asked if it was possible and I informed her that indeed it was. What she does with that information is her business. Next!
Dear Answer Man: What's the best sport of these 3: curling, golf or bowling? - Joe Sports.
Dear Joe Sports: You can't fool The Answer Man with trick questions, Joe! None of these are sports, but games. Anything that can be mastered by out-of-shape fat guys cannot be considered a sport. Might as well call Poker a sport too if you think those qualify. Next!
Dear Answer Man: Does everyone really love Raymond? - Bud Leicht
Dear Bud Leicht: Definitely not. Next!
Dear Answer Man: Where do birds go during the winter? - Harry Lewis
Dear Harry Lewis: Boca. Next!
Dear Answer Man: Is Glen Beck right about President Obama being the Nazi Antichrist who has been sent to destroy the earth? - Howie Doone
Dear Howie Doone: The next time Glen Beck is right about anything at all will be the first time, so the answer is no. Next!
Dear Answer Man: Can Donald Trump really become president? - Ophelia Mound
Dear Ophelia Mound: President of what? He's already president of The Trump Organization. Next!
Dear Answer Man: I meant the United States! - Ophelia Mound
Dear Ophelia Mound: Sorry, Ophelia, but there's no question here. Next!
Dear Answer Man: Yo, my man, I think she was asking if Donald Trump can ever be the President of The Untied States. -Lyle Eikarug
Dear Lyle Eikarug: Then why didn't she just say so? Trump for President of the USA... geez! Where do you people get this stuff? Next!
Dear Answer Man: What causes the Aurora Borealis? I think it is beautiful, like nature's own magic light show. - Jack Hoff
Dear Jack Hoff: Beautiful it certainly is, Jack Hoff, but not magic. Here's what causes it: Massive amounts of electrons are emitted from the Sun and carried on the solar wind. The aurora is produced when these electrons, attracted by the magnetism at the Earth's poles, slams into the atmosphere. When the electrons collide with the oxygen and nitrogen atoms, the atoms are ionized, and this ionization causes the atoms to become excited and emit photons of light. Different auroral colors are produced depending on the kind of atom involved with the collision. Oxygen generally produces shades of colors ranging from green to brown, and nitrogen produces shades of red or blue. Auroras are more often seen during the intense phase of the Sun's cycles. These increase the solar winds that are responsible for the creation of the auroras. (And you people thought I only go for the low hanging fruit! Hey, The Answer Man is only as good as your questions.) Next!
Dear Answer Man: What is the one true religion? - Benedict from Rome
Dear Benedict from Rome: According to their creeds, that would be all of them. Next!
Dear Answer Man: That's no answer! How can you say that? - Benedict from Rome
Dear Benedict from Rome: That's why they're called faiths and not facts, Benny. Enjoy yours and be happy. Next!
Dear Answer Man: Why do guys like bankers and CEO's of giant corporations steal when they're already really really rich? - Bill Melaighter
Dear Bill Melaighter: Because they really really can and we really really let them. Next!
Dear Answer Man: Is nuclear power really as dangerous as everyone is saying it is lately? - Cashen Carey
Dear Cashen Carey: When a country gets hit by a giant earthquake and a monstrous tsunami on the same day and finds out that those were the least of their problems, you have to check the ☑YES box on this one. Next!
Dear Answer Man: What can I do to get people to notice me? - Walt Flowers
Dear Walt Flowers: I'm sorry, were you saying something? I wasn't paying attention. Must be time for me to go. The Answer Man is outta here!
Dear Answer Man: You're a bit of a horse's ass, aren't you? - Heywood Djablomi
Dear Heywood Djablomi: Yes, yes I am, but at least my name isn't Heywood Djablomi! Next!
Dear Answer Man: What's the difference between genius and stupidity? - Al Dante
Dear Al Dante: Genius has its limits. Next!
Dear Answer Man: Is it true that you can't teach an old dog new tricks? -Freida Peebles
Dear Freida Peebles: Not true at all, Freida! Food and sleep deprivation combined with a cattle prod are marvelous motivational tools, even for old dogs who are "set in their ways." Next!
Dear Answer Man: That's just sick! -Freida Peebles
Dear Freida Peebles: I'm sorry Freida, but you didn't put this in the form of question so The Answer Man can't help you. Next!
Dear Answer Man: How can you give that lady such unethical advice? - Ben Dover
Dear Ben Dover: I'm sorry, but did you see anything about ethics or advice in Ms. Peebles' question? I sure didn't. She merely asked if it was possible and I informed her that indeed it was. What she does with that information is her business. Next!
Dear Answer Man: What's the best sport of these 3: curling, golf or bowling? - Joe Sports.
Dear Joe Sports: You can't fool The Answer Man with trick questions, Joe! None of these are sports, but games. Anything that can be mastered by out-of-shape fat guys cannot be considered a sport. Might as well call Poker a sport too if you think those qualify. Next!
Dear Answer Man: Does everyone really love Raymond? - Bud Leicht
Dear Bud Leicht: Definitely not. Next!
Dear Answer Man: Where do birds go during the winter? - Harry Lewis
Dear Harry Lewis: Boca. Next!
Dear Answer Man: Is Glen Beck right about President Obama being the Nazi Antichrist who has been sent to destroy the earth? - Howie Doone
Dear Howie Doone: The next time Glen Beck is right about anything at all will be the first time, so the answer is no. Next!
Dear Answer Man: Can Donald Trump really become president? - Ophelia Mound
Dear Ophelia Mound: President of what? He's already president of The Trump Organization. Next!
Dear Answer Man: I meant the United States! - Ophelia Mound
Dear Ophelia Mound: Sorry, Ophelia, but there's no question here. Next!
Dear Answer Man: Yo, my man, I think she was asking if Donald Trump can ever be the President of The Untied States. -Lyle Eikarug
Dear Lyle Eikarug: Then why didn't she just say so? Trump for President of the USA... geez! Where do you people get this stuff? Next!
Dear Answer Man: What causes the Aurora Borealis? I think it is beautiful, like nature's own magic light show. - Jack Hoff
Dear Jack Hoff: Beautiful it certainly is, Jack Hoff, but not magic. Here's what causes it: Massive amounts of electrons are emitted from the Sun and carried on the solar wind. The aurora is produced when these electrons, attracted by the magnetism at the Earth's poles, slams into the atmosphere. When the electrons collide with the oxygen and nitrogen atoms, the atoms are ionized, and this ionization causes the atoms to become excited and emit photons of light. Different auroral colors are produced depending on the kind of atom involved with the collision. Oxygen generally produces shades of colors ranging from green to brown, and nitrogen produces shades of red or blue. Auroras are more often seen during the intense phase of the Sun's cycles. These increase the solar winds that are responsible for the creation of the auroras. (And you people thought I only go for the low hanging fruit! Hey, The Answer Man is only as good as your questions.) Next!
Dear Answer Man: What is the one true religion? - Benedict from Rome
Dear Benedict from Rome: According to their creeds, that would be all of them. Next!
Dear Answer Man: That's no answer! How can you say that? - Benedict from Rome
Dear Benedict from Rome: That's why they're called faiths and not facts, Benny. Enjoy yours and be happy. Next!
Dear Answer Man: Why do guys like bankers and CEO's of giant corporations steal when they're already really really rich? - Bill Melaighter
Dear Bill Melaighter: Because they really really can and we really really let them. Next!
Dear Answer Man: Is nuclear power really as dangerous as everyone is saying it is lately? - Cashen Carey
Dear Cashen Carey: When a country gets hit by a giant earthquake and a monstrous tsunami on the same day and finds out that those were the least of their problems, you have to check the ☑YES box on this one. Next!
Dear Answer Man: What can I do to get people to notice me? - Walt Flowers
Dear Walt Flowers: I'm sorry, were you saying something? I wasn't paying attention. Must be time for me to go. The Answer Man is outta here!
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