DOPOTO REPORTS: WOMEN CAN BE SILLY BISHOPS TOO, BUT NOT GAY ONES.

The Department Of Pointing Out The Obvious (DOPOTO), has been monitoring developments in the world of religion. The Anglican Church, aka The Church of England, has voted to allow women to be ordained as bishops. While many view this as a step in the right direction, others denounce them for refusing to recognize the ordination of an openly gay man as an Anglican bishop. Well, DOPOTO has seen the clothes worn by bishops and wonders what's the problem here. Exactly why did they think their current bishops dress so flamboyantly? Hello!

The Anglican Church is the Christian sect that most closely mirrors the Catholic Church in doctrine and form of worship. It's founder, King Henry the 8th, designed it that way so that the English People wouldn't rebel against leaving the Church of Rome. Attending an Anglican service is pretty much an identical experience to attending mass in a Catholic Church, right down to the outrageous dress code. So apparently they feel it is their duty to be just as hypocritical as the Catholics when it comes to homosexuality.

And why not? They've got plenty of company when it comes to major religions. Check out Islam, a religion that vociferously condemns homosexuality yet practices it widely. Unlike Catholics, it's not only the priestly class who are in the closet, but a great many of the faithful. In many Islamic nations, not only are the women hidden head to toe in potato sacks, but are actually under house arrest while their husbands fool around with teenage boys. If that's what you like to do, well, fine, just don't punish the women because you're on the wood.

DOPOTO had determined that it is not the fault of Islamic women that their men prefer one another, they are just as attractive and sexy as women everywhere. Some humans are simply gay and that's that. It's religion that introduced the shame element to human sexuality and has yet to figure out a way to reseal that can of worms. So if the Anglicans want to split up into several splinter groups as seems likely with all this hoopla about women and gays in the bishops' offices, let them. Who will notice? Who will care beside Anglicans? It's not like any of these religions are teaching what is written in their instruction manuals anyway.

All that Love Thy Brother crap goes out the window when it comes to the distribution of power, and more than morality and spirituality, organized religion has always been about power over people. There is no government in history, no empire or individual tyrant who can claim even a tiny percentage of the bloodshed that religions have instigated. DOPOTO archives point to a long and bloody history of religious warfare that continues to this day. And what is at stake in all these religious wars? Like any other war, money, power and control. Why confuse the issue by practicing what your book preaches? That's for sissies. Real major religions want to kill their rivals and plunder their land.

So, rather than worry about whether women or gay people can get in on this action, DOPOTO respectfully suggests that all candidates for the clergy of any faith refrain from military activity or drop any claims of moral authority. Maybe a few more openly gay bishops and Imams might help that cause. Gays as a rule tend to have suffered persecution on many levels and are probably less likely to persecute others. Or maybe organized religions might take a look in the mirror and see how very silly they are with all their rituals and hypocrisy and call it a day. That won't happen, but it is the duty of The Department Of Pointing Out the Obvious to ask these questions.